my own hbo special

way back in the day, carter and i were watching hbo in our dorm room and came across this story about a crazy guy who decided he could not live indoors. i don't really remember much about the story. but one one excerpt really stuck with me:

the cameras followed him down an alley, behind a dumpster. the camera turned left, toward a wall that was streaked. the camera goes back to mr. crazy and he says, "it's feces. shit. means you're not allowed around here."

it was so funny and so disturbing that it has stuck with me. i can't even count how many times i have said it since. too many, i'm sure. and now i know it will never leave. and this is why...

yesterday morning, i went outside on my way to work and saw a pile of crap in the street, up against one of the backs of the houses where the mural is to live. flies were swarming and clinging to the ball of poo. i nearly puked. it was stained on the wall (hence the opening reference).

i walked a few steps further and saw it smeared on my neighbor's house! there was a plastic bag sitting over it. but it was so close to the other poo pile that it was just too suspect. whatever, i needed to get to work. and i was not about to touch it anyway.

later on friday night, a few neighbors were outside. the guy who had the poo on his house said he cleaned it up. everyone thinks it was HUMAN crap. disgusting. but a few of us, who are newer to the block, swear that it was a dog pile. there are facts for both sides:

For the Dogs:
there was a plastic bag. maybe that means an unknowing master had a puppy with diarrhea? maybe the mess was just so bad that they ran and left it. sadly, this is the only point under the "for the dogs" header.

For the Humans
Well, the ball of poo near the mural was sort of high on the wall. it seems almost impossible for a dog to crap that high. Strike one.
One of the neighbor's dogs wanted to eat the poo REALLY bad. i bet it had some tender vittles in it. sick.

in any case, it's all cleaned up now. in my mind, it was dog poo. not crackhead poo. i can not imagine what i would have done had i seen either incidences. i most likely would have yelled, "it's feces! shit! means your not allowed around here!"