liver, no onions.

my liver has been freed!

i had the stent removed from my liver yesterday morning. i went in at 8:30 for my 9:30 appointment, because of all of the prep time. first, they led me back to a patient prepping area where first they made me get changed. the woman handed me 2 of the XXXXL robes, which were really not necessary. i mean, i know i am chubbed out, but come on. i had to put two of them on, and the sleeves were so huge and baggy that they actually come down to my wrist. it was pretty funny. i felt like i was in a clown suit. because not only was it HUGE, it was also a different print from the regular sized robe. of course, never make the fatty feel comfortable, make them stand out even more.

so they sat me down, asked me 120 questions that they have asked me at least 10 times before, and got my IV in. that is never comfortable. then i sat there and waited to be escorted to my room. as i was sitting there, i listened to an old man tell a nurse that his "penis hurt" and that his wife died recently. god, i don't want to get old. then i found myself mesmerized by the print on the gown i was wearing. it was geometric shapes mixed with line drawings of several of those shapes. in many bright colors. it was very 80s. i was an 80s clown, about to have my body invaded with a scope. through my mouth.

so, finally, a guy came and took me to my operating room. he asked me if i was a wrestler...? so, i replied, "yes, a sumo wrestler." i am so weird.

i get into the room, i lay down, and he tells me that he is going to give me lydocane (not sure if that is spelled right, and i am not checking.)and that it was going to taste really horrible. like rotten bananas. people in the medical field have the weirdest analogies for feelings that things they administer give. when i was getting one of my 20 ct scans, the woman told me it would feel like i peed my pants. it sort of did. and i guess it sort of tasted like rotten bananas...drowning in chemicals?

so then they made me turn to my side and put this thing in my mouth. basically a contraption to keep it open. then i fell asleep.

i woke up at about 11, had some cranberry juice to rinse that gross chemical taste away, and got dressed. and that was it.

i slept almost all of yesterday. and now i am back at work. (it's a sloooow day today.) i do have some weird feelings in my side. let's hope i don't have to go through any of this again.